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Boy do I want a cookie right now. :(
- Mood:
annoyed
curiousI finally packed up all my clothes that are too small for me. That's a lot of clothes. Basically all my clothes. Now I am going to take the time to try to make the clothes I have left look decent and to start working toward putting the other clothes back in my closet because they fit again. It seems the first goal is a size 12. Sad but true.
- Mood:
busy
Well, I have been doing craptasitically on my diet. I have been moving more and getting so rest finally. I think one of my issues is lack of a goal. I have no tangible reason to keep myself in line. I am still at 206.5 so in an effort to have some sort of accountability I am setting the goal of under 200 by the end of the month. At the top end of my diet this SHOULD be no problem. I am also throwing away that awful bowl of Birthday candy.
Walked with Kim today. Apparently my hill is huge, but I knew that.
Walked with Kim today. Apparently my hill is huge, but I knew that.
Used my groupon for my visit to Physician Assisted weight loss clinic today. Today they did a brief physical, talked medical history, took all of my blood -- or what seemed like a metric ton -- and handed me a big bag of goodies for my first month. In two weeks I go back in to talk to the doctor about the blood panel results, which includes a series on hormone balance, testing thyroid function, yatta yatta, essentially to assess if there is anything medically wrong with me that might inhibit weight loss.
In the meantime, this bag of goodies contains phentermine, which is a prescription appetite suppressant that my medical doctor gave me a few years ago short term. After a few days in the mail I'll also be getting medical HCG, which I'm supposed to self-administer as a shot per day for 30-days. The goody bag has my needles and waste container for that, as well as vitamins and supplements I'm supposed to begin at the same time.
Then I have a handy-dandy folder of facts, which includes an "allowed foods list" for the first month, and details of a very restricted calorie diet plan to jump-start everything.
They all swear that in 30-days, if I stick to this, I'll be simply amazed at my results and want to continue for a few more months at least to lose all of the 60 pounds I admitted to wanting to lose. Truly, I'd like to lose more, but 60 would put me back in the healthy range. If I do end up wanting to continue, they want $185 a month for the renewal of supplements, the phentermine, and the HCG. Don't know about that dollar figure in my future, but 30 days would get me to this years family reunion so we'll just have to wait and see how impressive this program is.
Anywho, 30-days of no alcohol, super-calorie restricted diet starts as soon as my HCG gets here -- so in about 2 days.
In the meantime, this bag of goodies contains phentermine, which is a prescription appetite suppressant that my medical doctor gave me a few years ago short term. After a few days in the mail I'll also be getting medical HCG, which I'm supposed to self-administer as a shot per day for 30-days. The goody bag has my needles and waste container for that, as well as vitamins and supplements I'm supposed to begin at the same time.
Then I have a handy-dandy folder of facts, which includes an "allowed foods list" for the first month, and details of a very restricted calorie diet plan to jump-start everything.
They all swear that in 30-days, if I stick to this, I'll be simply amazed at my results and want to continue for a few more months at least to lose all of the 60 pounds I admitted to wanting to lose. Truly, I'd like to lose more, but 60 would put me back in the healthy range. If I do end up wanting to continue, they want $185 a month for the renewal of supplements, the phentermine, and the HCG. Don't know about that dollar figure in my future, but 30 days would get me to this years family reunion so we'll just have to wait and see how impressive this program is.
Anywho, 30-days of no alcohol, super-calorie restricted diet starts as soon as my HCG gets here -- so in about 2 days.
First REAL workout after having Gabriel. Ab moves are TOUGH. I ran a mile but it was a walk run and took 15 minutes. I also had some small treadmill issues that may need addressing. I have a nordic track and the "track" keeps listing to the left and the belt rubs a little. NO idea how to fix this. I can get it back to the center, but it just goes back after 2 minutes.
I also put together some "strength training" items that I am going to incorporate and see if it helps with some weight loss. Now sure how many times a week I am going to be able to do this cause getting him to nap is no small feat. The goal is as follows.
push ups
back extensions
latteral raise
bicept curls
tricep extentions
squats
calf raises
leg lifts
crunches
cardio
I didn't do the squats more than one rep cause I forgot and I didn't do the crunches cause the idea of it made me want to cry so I can only imagine how actually doing them might feel. I will do the leg lifts for now and try to work up to crunches.
So running, or most of the rest of this feels... different after pregnancy. Things are not really reacting the same way and I think the running was the hardest. Things were bouncing that should not. Like breastfeeding boobs MAY NOT bounce. It is a very bad idea. And a left over baby gut should also NOT be bounced. It is not firm at all so it really just flops around. God that's depressing. Here's to trying to fix it. I really think I need to just get my weight down, have another kid, get my weight down again and then have a nip and tuck. I can't see this funk going away otherwise.
I also put together some "strength training" items that I am going to incorporate and see if it helps with some weight loss. Now sure how many times a week I am going to be able to do this cause getting him to nap is no small feat. The goal is as follows.
push ups
back extensions
latteral raise
bicept curls
tricep extentions
squats
calf raises
leg lifts
crunches
cardio
I didn't do the squats more than one rep cause I forgot and I didn't do the crunches cause the idea of it made me want to cry so I can only imagine how actually doing them might feel. I will do the leg lifts for now and try to work up to crunches.
So running, or most of the rest of this feels... different after pregnancy. Things are not really reacting the same way and I think the running was the hardest. Things were bouncing that should not. Like breastfeeding boobs MAY NOT bounce. It is a very bad idea. And a left over baby gut should also NOT be bounced. It is not firm at all so it really just flops around. God that's depressing. Here's to trying to fix it. I really think I need to just get my weight down, have another kid, get my weight down again and then have a nip and tuck. I can't see this funk going away otherwise.
- Mood:
bouncy
South Beach Diet Phase 1 Guidelines and Food List
Phase 1 Guidelines
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Foods Allowed in Phase 1
BEEF Lean cuts, such as:
LAMB (Remove all visible fat)
PORK
POULTRY (SKINLESS)
SEAFOOD
TOFU
VEAL
EGGS
LUNCHMEAT
MEAT SUBSTITUTES (SOY BASED)
DAIRY
NUTS (Limit to one serving per day as specified)
In place of nuts, may use: Flax Seed - 3 TBS | VEGETABLE CHOICES (includes legumes) (May use fresh, frozen or canned without added sugar)
FAT CHOICES (with some suggested serving sizes) The following monounsaturated oils are recommended to be consumed daily:
Other Oil Choices that may be chosen (Polyunsaturated or a blend of Monounsaturated):
OTHER FAT CHOICES:
TOPPINGS & SAUCES use sparingly (check labels for added sugar)
SPICES AND SEASONINGS
SWEET TREATS (Limit to 75 calories per day)
Products may be made with sugar alcohols (isomalt, lactitol, mannitol, sorbitol or xylitol) and are permitted on the SBD. They may have associated side effects of GI distress (abdominal pain, diarrhea & gas) if consumed in excessive amounts. SUGAR SUBSTITUTES
|
Foods NOT Allowed and to be Avoided in Phase 1
VEGETABLES
POULTRY
PORK
VEAL
FRUIT
| DAIRY
STARCHES AND CARBS Avoid ALL starchy food in Phase 1, including:
CHEESE
MISCELLANEOUS
|
- Mood:fat
Going to my first meeting with a personal trainer tomorrow. Time to slay the slug beast.
- Mood:fat
I'm officially obsessed with taking a fitness retreat. I know I've always wanted to do something like this, but lately I've just been feeling so trapped inside myself that I can't seem to get going in any direction. I know what I need to do, I just can't find the will to do it. I've had so much time lately (unemployed) which I can't even tell you how I spend because it's a blur of tired, depressed, television to distract, books to distract, maybe a workout video, mostly snacking. I've had a plan to start getting up earlier to do a gentle morning workout, which I thought might jumpstart my day and get myself on a likely schedule for getting up early for a new job, but that hasn't worked out. Being at home is just making me into a slug. So depressed.
Yes, I stopped taking the happy pill from the doc back in January after only a couple months. It had gotten to the point on it that the side effects seemed to have gone away, but then so had everything else. Now I've gotten to the point that the withdrawal symptoms have gone away, and I find that I'm not quite back in that horrible place I was when I decided to see the doctor, but I'm still feeling quite overwhelmed so that I don't know how to start anything.
And, well, in my mind I just don't feel like I've had a good stress-free vacation in a while -- Florida birthday trip was as good as it could be, but that was still at the beginning of a lot of personal issues, meds and stress. So the more I read, and watch the videos, and read the stories about people who have taken a health retreat, the more I just think that I need this. I think I've now convinced myself that I CAN'T make any headway without this kind of super-selfish jump-start even though it is money I shouldn't spend. I feel most terrible because of the cost, like I'm not worth it somehow.
James seems to be of the opinion that this week-long fat-camp won't be what I'm looking for, that it won't be long enough for me to lose weight, and thus just a waste of money for us. And sure, a week isn't long to lose weight, but is it long enough to form some new habits that I can bring home and continue? If I know what to do, but just can't make myself do it, would a week of not having anything to worry about except focusing on me get me started? There's a schedule of guided activities from dawn until dusk, which includes 3 meals and 2 snacks prepared for you. There would be two meetings with counselors about my weight loss struggles. There would be a daily class from a chef/nutritionist and/or shopping coach to help with strategies to take home. The program is all about teaching you skills to take home.
Mostly, though, I just want to get out of here for an escape. I want to be someplace else where I'm not wallowing in my own self-pity or distracting myself by worrying about other people's problems. I'd like to focus, center, relax, and explore my own strengths and motivations. Who wouldn't, I guess.
Here's what I'm thinking about: http://www.hhhealth.com
So, am I just crazy to consider this right now, without any definite means of income in my future, knowing this is the last thing our credit cards need, and putting even more stress on James to deal with since he has his own needs like a reliable car?
Yes, I stopped taking the happy pill from the doc back in January after only a couple months. It had gotten to the point on it that the side effects seemed to have gone away, but then so had everything else. Now I've gotten to the point that the withdrawal symptoms have gone away, and I find that I'm not quite back in that horrible place I was when I decided to see the doctor, but I'm still feeling quite overwhelmed so that I don't know how to start anything.
And, well, in my mind I just don't feel like I've had a good stress-free vacation in a while -- Florida birthday trip was as good as it could be, but that was still at the beginning of a lot of personal issues, meds and stress. So the more I read, and watch the videos, and read the stories about people who have taken a health retreat, the more I just think that I need this. I think I've now convinced myself that I CAN'T make any headway without this kind of super-selfish jump-start even though it is money I shouldn't spend. I feel most terrible because of the cost, like I'm not worth it somehow.
James seems to be of the opinion that this week-long fat-camp won't be what I'm looking for, that it won't be long enough for me to lose weight, and thus just a waste of money for us. And sure, a week isn't long to lose weight, but is it long enough to form some new habits that I can bring home and continue? If I know what to do, but just can't make myself do it, would a week of not having anything to worry about except focusing on me get me started? There's a schedule of guided activities from dawn until dusk, which includes 3 meals and 2 snacks prepared for you. There would be two meetings with counselors about my weight loss struggles. There would be a daily class from a chef/nutritionist and/or shopping coach to help with strategies to take home. The program is all about teaching you skills to take home.
Mostly, though, I just want to get out of here for an escape. I want to be someplace else where I'm not wallowing in my own self-pity or distracting myself by worrying about other people's problems. I'd like to focus, center, relax, and explore my own strengths and motivations. Who wouldn't, I guess.
Here's what I'm thinking about: http://www.hhhealth.com
So, am I just crazy to consider this right now, without any definite means of income in my future, knowing this is the last thing our credit cards need, and putting even more stress on James to deal with since he has his own needs like a reliable car?
- Mood:headachy
Page Summary
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.2)
aoide : Emotional eating [+2] - flerly : Five minutes a day for your butt! [+0]
- flerly : exercise induced orgasm? [+0]
- aoide : New clothes [+1]
- aoide : not even close to 145 [+0]
- flerly : Physician Assisted weight loss [+1]
- aoide : Oh that picture is such a joke [+0]
- flerly : FYI: South Beach Diet Guidelines for Phase I (2 weeks+) [+0]
- flerly : Despite what the cat in the icon says... [+0]
- flerly : Am I just insane? [+1]
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